Plans and people change. I generally hate change, it makes me anxious and all at sea. I’ve been forced to accept change recently. Quite a lot of change. I haven’t wanted to and I’ve dug my heels in. Yeah, I sound like a brat, I know, but I’m a Taurean and we abhor change.
Today life walloped me hard across the back of the head and for a moment I felt my foundations rock. But then I heard my own voice, inside my head say “you’re made of sterner stuff than this” and my resolve strengthened immediately. I did what was necessary at that moment and now I feel freer than I have for a while. The image that sprang to mind was of the kid in the movie Up, when he and the guy are floating around with the balloons. This made me smile, something I felt was extraordinary given the situation I was in.
And so I’m walking a whole new path now, not the one I thought I’d be journeying along right now but it’s the one I’m on nevertheless. I love the feeling of freedom that is tempting me to go forward, promising there is nothing to fear. I love how it feels so right and obvious and how someone I know who faced a similar dilemma proved that everything is possible if you just believe.
Of course I have feelings I have to deal with. They are quite negative and I don’t quite know what I’m going to do with them yet, well, I do know I won’t be letting them rent space in my head. Maybe I’ll do what I do best and write it all down, get a sense of what’s trying to stick to me and what’s floating away naturally.
What is obvious to me now is how the old way of doing things is no longer fit for purpose. When a way of living is no longer for for purpose we have no choice but to modernise our lives. No matter how scary that prospect is we have to see this as a blessing and accept the gift the universe is handing us, accept it with gratitude and grow stronger.