A Daily Om about Worth.

Worth

Your worth is not a product of your intelligence, your talent, your looks, or how much you have accomplished.Though much of who and what we are changes as we journey through life, our inherent worth remains constant. While the term self-worth is often used interchangeably with self-esteem, the two qualities are inherently different. Self-esteem is the measure of how you feel about yourself at a given moment in time. Your worth, however, is not a product of your intelligence, your talent, your looks, your good works, or how much you have accomplished. Rather it is an immeasurable and unchanging manifestation of your eternal and infinite oneness with the universe. It represents the cornerstone of the dual foundations of optimism and self-belief. Your worth cannot be taken from you or damaged by life’s rigors, yet it can easily be forgotten or even actively ignored. By regularly acknowledging your self-worth, you can ensure that you never forget what an important, beloved, and special part of the universe you are. 

You are born worthy — your worth is intertwined with your very being. Your concept of your own self-worth is thus reinforced by your actions. Each time you endeavor to appreciate yourself, treat yourself kindly, define your personal boundaries, be proactive in seeing that your needs are met, and broaden your horizons, you express your recognition of your innate value. During those periods when you have lost sight of your worth, you will likely feel mired in depression, insecurity, and a lack of confidence. You’ll pursue a counterfeit worth based on judgment rather than the beauty that resides within. When you feel worthy, however, you will accept yourself without hesitation. It is your worth as an individual who is simultaneously interconnected with all living beings that allows you to be happy, confident, and motivated. Because your conception of your worth is not based on the fulfillment of expectations, you’ll see your mistakes and failures as just another part of life’s journey.  

Human beings are very much like drops of water in an endless ocean. Our worth comes from our role as distinct individuals as well as our role as an integral part of something larger than ourselves. Simply awakening to this concept can help you rediscover the copious and awe-inspiring worth within each and every one of us.

A change of opinion….

I have always considered Mercury retrograde to be a time where I am going to be confused, a time where there are delays, technology not working for me, traffic jams, and general annoyances. But recently I read something that made me stop and think.

What if we were looking at Mercury retrograde all wrong?

What if we use this time to pause and reflect? What if we use this time to just be still? No big decisions, no major life choices, just looking at where we’ve been in life over the last few weeks or months. Just assessing everything and making sure we are where we want to be, and if not, planning what steps we need to take to get there.

I think a lot of us have got caught up in the mercury retrograde hype and tend to focus on what can go wrong instead of how we can use the energies to enhance our lives.

I still think the communication and technology glitches will occur, but I’m going to do my best to use the energies in a positive way rather than see them as a bad and negative thing.

Monday Musing- 06/09/21.

Last night I saw a comment on Facebook that really made me think. It was from a woman who had posted a photograph of herself after she’d had fake eyelashes done and Botox. Now, that’s not my cup of tea, but one of the comments she made in reply to a friend complimenting her kinda made me smile.

I’m paraphrasing here, but her comment was something like she is beautiful inside and out and the “work” she gets done is to enhance her outer and inner beauty.

I used to be rather critical of people who wanted to get their lashes, or their lips done. Or get Botox, or breast enhancements. But do you know what, it’s not really anyone else’s business is it. If this kind of “work” helps a woman feel at her best then that’s the main thing.

Cheerleading other women is my jam now, and it’s hard some of the time, especially when that woman might rub me up the wrong way, or if she makes questionable choices. But we have enough on our plates trying to get on in this world with patriarchal rules trying to keep us small.

So what if we women make choices about OUR bodies! They’re our bodies, they belong to us and if we want to get any kind of enhancement then so be it. If we feel the need to terminate a pregnancy, then so be it. Men, and women who act like men have no right to dictate what we do with our bodies.

We should always be in full control of what happens to us – and this applies to men too. By focusing on ourselves rather than everyone else we get to take our power back and make choices for us rather than for what anyone else thinks, or wants us to do for their benefit.

Stand strong and be proud.

What’s been happening at suepk HQ.

It’s been a hectic couple of weeks here at suepk HQ. My 8 year old Granddaughter is staying for awhile as her Mum (my daughter) had a bad fall and has several fractures on her hip. She’s had an operation to pin it all back together, so she’s on the road to recovery.

I have been snowed under with studying; my first module for my degree is done and dusted and I passed that, yay! My second module is also coming to an end, but I have assessments coming up. I’ve also been doing an accredited course for Mental Health Awareness, and I’m about to start a Counselling Skills course.

In the UK a person cannot practice as a psychologist or counsellor unless they have certain accreditations, or a master’s degree. I don’t know if I will do a master’s degree, so that’s why I decided to take the accreditations.

A few years ago I started my own biz, Soul Love, where I offered a range of services from Tarot readings to mentoring. I’ve incorporated other aspects over the years and I offered healing and advice on a variety of subjects.

But then my illness reared it’s ugly head again and everything went on hold. I still have my biz, but I’m not working at the moment. The thing about chronic illness and being the only person who can do the work is that everything stops. It’s great news for my body as I rest and recuperate, but it’s not so great for my wallet. Believe me, I’d rather be earning, but it is what it is and it’s out of my hands.

Studying has meant I have been able to learn new skills that will help me in my biz in future. I am not able to do both, sadly. The choice is one or the other. That’s another thing that sucks about chronic illness, you have to make choices about what you can do. If I wasn’t sick I’d be able to do both, but I don’t really dwell on that anymore as it gets me nowhere.

Another spanner in the works has been the pandemic. I had wanted to get involved with organisations who help females who have suffered sexual violence, but safety had to come first and I wasn’t able to do this. It’s been quite frustrating knowing that this could be hugely helpful for my plans, but not being able to get involved because of COVID.

I’ve been busy making plans here instead. Chronic illnesses and pandemics may have prevented me from taking the path I had planned to, but they haven’t stopped me from making plans and putting those plans into action behind the scenes.

Delays may be an inevitable aspect of life, but I’ve began to accept them as pauses that allow me to tweak my plans. I’ve spent many years feeling frustrated by delays, but now I’m able to use them productively and for that I’m grateful.

Monday Motivation – 12/07/2021.

I agree with this so much. Recently I was mulling over some work related choices and some of my reasoning left me feeling deflated. A voice inside my head kept telling me to do what makes me happy. It’s vital to follow your heart.

The problem we have, myself included, is that we think things through, again, and again, and again. It’s this over thinking that trips us up. It leads us down the path of self doubt, then onto feeling like we aren’t worthy, like we’re not good enough.

That’s when we give up. We have talked ourselves out of something that would be have been oh so good for us. And what for? The reason is we didn’t trust our inner knowing. We didn’t trust our gut.

Listen to your heart ❤️

Monday Musing – 05/07/21.

I wrote a few weeks back about my 50th birthday, this post is kind of a continuation from that.

Due to being stuck at a certain phase of life due to trauma I have never really celebrated life phases, becoming a mother – so moving from my maiden stage of life to the mother stage, becoming a grandmother (I was 42) and when I reached the menopausal era that just happened. No celebrations for these life phases.

Of course the healing therapies that I took part in really shifted me from victim to survivor, and then to who I am now. And who I am now is a 50 year old woman, been married for 31 years, have 3 adult kids (30, 28, 24) and 1 granddaughter (8). As I turned 50 I realised I’d reached cronehood.

And reaching this period of my life I spent time reflecting. About life. About loss. About grief. Realising life is very definitely for living. Understanding that we are steering our own lives and directing our own fate. We may not have control over everything that happens to us, but how we react is all us.

Realising I am now in my crone years I began to understand a few things about myself. A big takeaway for me is that I have allowed other people to dictate my happiness when that is mine to decide. I have allowed so called friends to use me, to abuse my generosity and willingness to help. One friend in particular whom I’ve known for over 15 years treat me appallingly. No matter what other friends and my family said I stayed loyal. But one day, when my own personal life hit a tumultuous time she turned her back on me because I dared to be friends with someone she doesn’t like.

I’m a believer in giving people chances. I probably give some people more chances than they deserve. But what really got me riled was how this so called friend was all over social media, and in real life, preaching love, light, harmony and forgiveness. Yet my own act of love and forgiveness to this other person was seen as a betrayal. I was lied about and criticised, and then blocked everywhere.

It was deja vu for me because this isn’t the first time this so called friend has done this to me. If I do something she doesn’t like this is what she does. And yet I remained loyal. Much to the chagrin of my family and other friends.

So as I have reached cronehood I have shed my skin once more. I’ve decided that my life, my rules is a good motto to follow. Who I let in is my choice and won’t be dictated to by some hypocritical liar who gets to piss all over my life and tries to dictate who I should be friends with. And yes, she gets to choose this for her own life too. I respect and honour that. If she chooses to not have me in her life, then so be it. But lies and games are not needed.

Cronehood, for me, has been quite the adventure so far. Opportunities have presented themselves to me that I’ve never even considered an option before. That sense of mothering has now taken a back seat, yes it is still present, but it watches from afar. Ready to step back in if needed, ready to guide and help. Cronehood isn’t the death sentence I once imagined it would be, it is so much more than I ever imagined it would and could be.

The crone years have brought me to a place where I can offer up my own distinctive talents and use them to help others. There are plans in the pipeline, being finalised and fine tuned. On some levels they are already in use, but hitting the going public button is taking a little longer. Chronic illness has played a part in this. But realising that I get sick when I do too much, I stepped back and let life flow with ease and grace. Younger me would’ve been chomping at the bit, pushing my body to its limits, burning the candle at both ends. This new me stepped back and rested. And watched. And learnt some valuable lessons too.

To be a crone is often to be viewed as a wise woman, a healer, a witch who is older. I believe cronehood incorporates all of those things and much, much more. It certainly isn’t anything to be afraid of or ashamed of. It’s all about embracing who I am. Who I have become and who I will become. I’m very much present in my life, conscious of who I am and who I portray to the outside world. I’m in control of my own life, my own destiny.

Cronehood is a stage of life that many women are denied, so I plan to embrace it and live life to the fullest.

How do you cope on bad days?

Any illness will have bad days. Whether physical or mental. Right now I’m having bad days from both.

Coping is a struggle, but it’s a necessity and finding what’s right for you has to come from you. Tools, ideas, suggestions, techniques, they’re ten a penny. There’s an abundance of them online, in books, in magazines, advice from therapists, etc. But you have to find your own coping strategy.

This can be relatively easy, or it can be hard. We are all different and we all react to stress factors differently. But one thing I have found is listening to my body. That said, not everyone can tune in during a time of crisis.

Half the battle can often be getting the gremlins in your head to pipe down for long enough to hear yourself think, and to decide how you’re going to tackle the black cloud that’s hanging over you.

This isn’t a do it this way post. What works for me won’t necessarily work for the next person. This post is just a quiet reminder that this will pass.

Monday Musing – 10/05/21.

I was reading an article yesterday about how we should embrace our childhood passions in order to help us navigate our careers, present or future.

My childhood passion was to be a Jedi knight.

At first I laughed because how could I ever follow my childhood dream? But then I got thinking about what a Jedi knight encompasses. Upholding certain laws. Embracing the energy of the universe and using it for good. Fighting evil.

Whilst there are certain aspects of this particular passion that I cannot ever hope to emulate, there are at least one or two qualities I can embrace and even incorporate into my career.

Sometimes we over complicate our lives. We over think plans or ideas and then dismiss them as impossible. Just because something is easy, or is simple, doesn’t mean it isn’t effective.

If you aren’t living your childhood dream it’s maybe worth revisiting that passion. You never know, you could rework a once cherished idea and make it work for your future.